While the neon lights of Corrientes may seem inviting, there is a whole other scene in town to be discovered, one without billboards and big names. Alternative theatre in the capital is hotter than ever, with avant-garde plays and actors displaying their work in original spaces.

Denim jackets, sweat dripping off the ceiling and no reggaeton within earshot; this is not a typical night out in Palermo, but that’s the point. We’re here at the first night of the ‘Kustom Rock’ festival in Salón Pueyrredon as some of Buenos Aires’ hottest hard rock/punk bands perform to their faithful public.

Monday nights in Buenos Aires are generally quiet. So what is a poor restless soul to do? The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. Blowing you all the way down to La Cigale for some live music.

Naming a night after a Slovenian sociologist, philosopher and social critic, who has the beard to match, married an Argentine and found himself splashed across the pages of ‘Caras’ is perhaps suitable for a party like Žižek

Every weekend in an inconspicuous Buenos Aires park, shuffling pensioners walking their dogs are replaced by stomping youths showcasing their latest piercing, hair colour or eyeliner. For a quiet park in the upmarket Recoleta barrio this appears odd.

“Hola, I’m a student from Buenos Aires who guides tourists as a part time job. But don’t expect me to guide you. First I have to check if you are cool enough for me.”

A day spent in Buenos Aires exploring the vices on tap is a day worth your while. Everyone knows the bars and nightclubs are colourful here, but what better way to start a day o’ sin than through the seedy world of gambling.

If you go down to the woods today, you’re sure of a big surprise… Instead of teddy bears, you could be sharing your tartan throw and cream teas with some of Buenos Aires’ transvestites.

Don’t tell my parents, but I’m thinking about getting a tattoo. Something small, tasteful, on the nape of my neck, so I can reveal and conceal it at will. Something symbolic of my time in Argentina.

Food and sex are two of the basic necessities of life. It is no wonder then that the languages of the two often overlap and intertwine. In English we have plenty of words that apply equally to food and sex: ‘hunger’, ‘crave’, ‘devour’, ‘suck’, ‘to eat out’. But here in Argentina, they seem to have many more food/sex expressions than we do (and we are talking about much more than just the obvious naming of private parts after phallic looking fruits and vegetables).